I had a crying spell yesterday after my consult with a doctor in Chicago. He heard me. I knew he understood me when he described back what he heard and what his assumptions on what my struggles are.

Have you ever went so long feeling UNHEARD that when someone finally did, you just wept?

I love having space for just me. The me when I’m happy, the me when I’m sad, the me when I’m mad.

A place where I can say what I want and be who I want.

This is ME!

For three years now, I’ve struggled losing strength slowly. I’d take three steps forward and be thrown two steps back. Half the time feeling like a crazy person and half the time feeling like I know exactly what I am talking about.

I believe I have nerve entrapment. I believe my FOUR C-section scars (the very same scar each time) has grown through my tendons and ligament and all my inguinal ligament on my right hip and caused pulling on groin muscles, causing nerve entrapment and numbness and weakness and sometimes the kind of weakness that stops you and drops you in your tracks.

The good news is that I have come forward a fair amount. Not as far as I would prefer in three years but I do know I’ve not fallen backwards.

At 55, I don’t feel I have room to play. I MUST build my bones and not being able to strength train regularly worries me.

I have what I thought was a trigger point in my rectus femoris (thigh muscle) and I worked it really hard. At the time it felt very relieved and great! But…then I coudn’t move for days…I still can’t walk without what feels like a nerve pinching. It’s awful! My lower body from the belly button down is so tired and weak feeling.

But in 10 days I go see Dr. Shutlz and he specializes in nerve entrapment and I plan to feel better by the end of January if not sooner!

Don’t ever give up on yourself!